Thursday, June 05, 2008

Shall I compare thee to a Summer's dreck?

I'd say the above referenced paintings pretty much describe how I feel right now after watching the Dodgers eat maggot shit to the Cubs in the first game of what will surely be a four game sweep at Chavez Ravine. After Sunday, the Big Blue Buttfucking crew will have eaten crap a total of roughly 15 out of the last 17 games. All that being said, they are still only a paltry four games out of first in the worst division in the history of the league.

In addition, I spent roughly a year supporting my candidate Hillary Clinton, only to watch her get digested by Obama and spit out into the pits of Hades and back to whence she came. Another casualty of the Tony Forkush factor of failure.

Add to that the woeful decripitude of my acting career, the laugh in your face rejections by women for the past twenty five years, the terrifying lonliness, the isolation and empty phone machine messages, living in the heart of Hollywood with the rest of the lost souls, alone and on my own and....well, I'd say you pretty much get the picture.

If you put two and three and four together, a pattern starts to emerge. A pattern of mmmmmmmm.......

And one wonders why one continues to keep reaching, Charlie Brown like for the elusive spiritual football that the lord thy God keeps wrenching from our attempts at immortality. This may be the single greatest image of the futility and absurdity of the human condition. That poor little bald kid who can't help himself and keeps risking, trying, trusting. Only to have the absolute inevitable waiting for him, as it waits for all of us. We keep seeing the light that say's "no entry" to our deepest desires and human hopes. Things that others are awarded with impunity by the Universe and its creator. Are they the meek? Do they supplicate with more fervor than I, with more piety and honor? The wretched of the earth are given the keys to the Kingdom over and over, and I am given Matt Kemp.

This is not to say I am ungrateful, though, of course, I am. It is to say simply that three to four major areas of desire are closed for repairs because...and this is paramount...GOD WILL NOT ALLOW IT!

Why, you ask?


And that is the answer to that. End of story, next scene please.

Clearly the reason these portals remain blocked is due to my sinful acts of pride. I desire the above mentioned dreams AHEAD of the Lord, and he knows this. He sees I am a man of God who understands my wickedness and he wants me to enter the Kingdom with him, but I cannot as long as I place ANYTHING ahead of him. It is simply decreed it be so. He gives the unrighteous everything they deserve here on earth because he knows that the gates of Heaven are closed FOREVER to them anyway, why not let them have a good time until the jig is up, oh wicked fools.

I get to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune in order to be prepared for the holy reunion with my creator. He has removed these foul objects of decay over and over again, barring the way, in preparation for the annointing of my eternal soul.

And it is close, my God. It is so close. I can feel it and know that your commands are my deepest desire. Thank you for bringing me to you by vanquishing all things of this earth that wreak of pestilence and fornication without love.

I have sinned and the son of man has come to bless me by destroying my hopes and dreams. Thank you Lord. I await your chariot to home, out of the hideous bonds and chains of death. Lift me up out of this despicable inferno to the light of Havona.


Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

Did I see correctly, or did the Dodgers win?

12:52 AM  
Blogger Tony Forkush said...

God heard my last post.

12:11 PM  
Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

Let's do some soul searching here. No, playing the victim, or over criticizing the Dodgers. We love the Dodgers in spite of the owner shift in the past decade. That being said, our heart and soul is with this team. We have good talent coming out of Las Vegas and a proven winner in Joe Torre. There is no reason that this team should not win. None at all.

This losing streak they have been going on is aggravating. As of late, the Diamondbacks have been playing bad. This should have been the Dodgers chance to catch them. Not only catch, but develop their character on how they will contend when the playoffs arrive.

Instead, they have blown opportunities and have not gotten any kind of grove. There is no reason for this. They have been playing some bad teams and cannot beat them.

It's not too late in the season for a push, but they need to do it and soon. They need some kind of shake up like the Lakers had or something. I don't know, but I'm sick of looking at the sports page and seeing another loss. I mean, a string of loses.

I think to myself, "Certainly they will not lose five in row." Then the next day, "Certainly they will not lose six in a row." The next day after than, "No, they can't lose seven in row can they? Can they?"

Losing two or three in a row then winning a bit is an okay season. To go on these losing streaks is frustrating to say the least. I do mean the least because my good friend Tony has said plenty for all of us.

Let's hope this will be the beginning of the return to glory. God knows we waited long enough.

2:47 PM  
Blogger JamieB. said...

Fork and Pascoe as Dodger fans remind me of what I always say to actors who were so deep in devastating despair over their lagged careers. I'm always like - "Dude, relax. If you were doing two lines on "N.Y.P.D. Blue" you'd be drinking margaritas right now."

7:51 PM  
Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

You're right Jamie, but it's frustrating.

10:27 AM  
Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

Let's talk about the Lakers. The Lakers need to win. If only to revenge the people at my work. I come to work this morning and someone took my Laker wallpaper off of my computer and put Celtic pride in place of it. Like I need that this morning after last night’s heartbreak. We need to beat these SOB’s.

7:36 AM  
Blogger Tony Forkush said...

Lakers 0 and 4 against the Red Auerbachs this season. Only three teams ever come back from 0 and 2 to win the series. Kobe selfish again.

Leprachauns win in 5.

8:54 AM  
Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

The Dodgers did it against the Yankees. Granted that's baseball, but it can happen with this crazy 2-3-2 format.

Phil Jackson is going to have to do a better job. Some of the decisions down the stretch was suspect. Why did they run out of timeouts? Why did Kobe inbound the ball? He should have been on the court making his move to get into position for the three. Kobe did a nice job in passing the ball when the great Celtic defense stopped him. They need to buckle down and figure this team out before it’s too late.

9:54 AM  
Blogger JamieB. said...

You never want to be in the position where you whine about the refs but that was a joke. Phil Jackson hit the nail on the head in his post game. Even though the Lakers have lost both games I still can't get over the feeling that the Lakers are the better team. Losing the series would well take care of that.

10:30 PM  
Blogger JamieB. said...

When the Lakers were only up by 7 points after Garnett and Pierce were 0 for 96 and then tied and even ahead, I was thinking "The Lakers can't beat these guys." Turiaf doing a terrific job on Garnett and what Garnett is doing to Gasol borders on anal violation.

8:24 PM  
Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

Yeah, it's difficult to tell where Garnett starts and Gasol ends. At the end, Gasol finally flexed his muscles.

Kobe was the man. Sasha did what I thought he would do. He should be the starter.

10:17 PM  

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