Friday, April 24, 2009

Dodgers win brutal game 1 at Coors Field 6 to 5. Shit, I'm exhausted!

Just finished watching the DVR version of tonight's Dodgers V. Rockies game from That pissoir called Coors Field. Just look at those losers and their children playing baseball in forty degree weather a mile above the earth. Who gives a shit. Fuck them! Assholes.

But anyway, the Dodgers were MEN tonight, let me tell you. All except that little bitch Matt Kemp who struck out like ten fucking times and then almost killed Manny Ramirez AND Rafael Furcal with one fell swoop. Dodgers left like a hundred and ten men on base but still somehow, someway found a way to ward off the evil spirits of Brad Hawpe and Troy SuckMYWitzki. Manny Corpus my ass gave up the go ahead to my boy Ozzie Ausmus, you know the genius from Dartmouth, who is about to overshadow the roid master Martin out of the lineup. Well, not really, but Loretta and my boy Ozzie really took it to the Rocks tonight. Also, Hong Chi Kuo pitches like a mental patient (I should know), throwing hundred mile and hour balls over the backstop and into the camera well. He sucks fuck, at least right now.

But my boys in blue kicked fuck tonight. Although those assholes from San Diego keep fucking around and hanging on around my balls beating the Pirates in extras tonight. Fuck off those fuckers. They will drop off soon enough. Losers!

Anyway, I will take all psych meds tomorrow. But for tonight.....Go UTAH JAZZ!!!!!!!


Blogger JamieB. said...

It's great to see Forky back in action, albeit a little harsh and unhinged (perfect for me but maybe not for the masses.) Perhaps he'll make a stop at King-Jew to re-up those meds. Not that he doesn't have 604 different scrips already but what's one more for little poopsy?

8:58 AM  
Blogger Tony Forkush said...

Eat a bowl of fuck!

12:36 PM  
Blogger Tony Forkush said...

But seriously J, that game last night sent me over the edge. It really was a dark journey to the outer edges of how insane the game can be and what it can become. We often forget about "the dark" side of baseball. It will remind us of that. Just ask the Cal. Angels.

12:37 PM  
Blogger Michael Pascoe said...

"Eat a bowl of fuck!"

Yeah, Tony is back. That's the Tony I know. The most over used use of useless metaphors since the day of that grand master of fucking fucks, Bill Duncan.

Now you might ask, "Is Bill Duncan worse than Joe Pesci? Doesn't Pesci hold the record for the most f bombs? How can your guy Bill Duncan beat Pesci?" Go fuck yourself, you ask too many questions!

2:50 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home