Wednesday, June 22, 2005

What women dig in a man

diminutive stature,
poorly muscled,
penis minimus,
bloated gut,
absolute lack of confidence,
always thinks he's right,
whining self pity,
needs someone to take care of him,
can't take care of himself,
sweet and nice man with genteel features,
revulsion to female smells and orifices,
confusion during sex,
enervating sexual passivity,
perpetual fear in the eyes,
Mama's boy but Daddy's bitch,
sober pop drinker,
small hands and feet with doubled chin,
imploded micro-phallice,
continual impotence and wounded sexual terror,
denuded patriarchal aptitude,
general decrepitude,
perpetual bachelor sized apartment,
tries way too hard to get it hard,
overwhelming gift giver with premature ejaculatory syndrome,
miniature testicles with inverted sack producing thimbleful of seminal fluid,
unclear negotiation of female erogenous zones,
occasional high pitched blurts,
odiferous snoring,
virtually no idea of his purpose in life,
passionless "live for tomorrow not today" attitude,
slow-poke driver in economy vehicle,
fumbling inept kisser,
a strong sense of not providing for himself and others,
living in the past,
fear- Forget Everything And Run,
cream cheese ass with hairy patches.


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