Saturday, July 16, 2005

I stumbled

I stumbled last week. I fell down. Scratch that...I tripped myself running. I stuck out my right foot and kicked the left foot out from under me. My right foot, Lucy, didn't appreciate my left foot, Charlie Brown. My left foot was catching up. My left foot started thinking about who I really was. It started to believe, the gall, that I was not a failure. It began to suspect that I am not perfect and that there is no shame at all in being human. But perhaps the ultimate indignity to my right foot was my recognition that I am the one who I am looking for to take care of me. I am the one who can take care of myself. I accept that responsibility. I no longer needed to hide this. It doesn't matter what I feel about my life, my job, my career, my hopes and dreams. The truth is only that I need not hide. But because I am human, I have an imperfect fear of admitting these larger truths of my humanness. If I leave the domain of limited thinking and awareness, what the fuck will happen to the smaller me that dreams of being the larger one? My yearning to become that which I am strangely perpetuates the status quo by reminding myself that I NEED to be the larger self, of which I already am. Ya dig? That's the victim mentality we hear about and can't seem to shake. Fear and guilt are the language which keeps us hoping for the truth. Hoping for the truth is blocking the truth. YOU ARE THE TRUTH. Please don't stop it by reaching for it. You are just getting in your own way. Once you realize this, the shroud of dread begins to lift and you need do nothing. You are the completeness you seek. Seek no more. That's the key you seek. That's the key you have with you and have always had. Forgive yourself. Be joyful. Love your right foot.


Post a Comment

<< Home